Explain the Difference

When I returned to the Main Fires I overheard Ayguili questioning Kaeli .. she had different answers for him than she did for me .. but I do understand that. I am not the Ubar.

Asria told me she had not washed anything of mine nor cleaned any of my dishes. I told her she was the perfect ward.

smirk

She told me I was funny .. so funny they were thinking of naming a year for how funny I was. I scratched my jaw and offered "Year of the Amazingly Humorous Fonce?". She did not seem to be as impressed as she said she was.

huh

Ayguili chained Kaeli to the other wagon wheel that was empty of dweller. I was a little surprised but .. supported his decision. I was not sure how serious Ayguili would be .. seems he is very serious about his word. Means I will take it seriously. A man teaches other men how serious to take his words by how he takes his own. How well he stands by them.

Ayguili questioned the dweller .. found out she was indeed from Port Kar and she wished him to return her to her father.

huh

Ayguili asked her why he would do such a thing. Her reason? She was young.

huh

Kaeli reminded the dweller to tell us what her father did .. in Port Kar. The dweller said her father was a Captain. Well .. a Port Kar Captain's fresh daughter kneeling at the feet of the Tuchuk Ubar? What could be more perfect?

But it was not to be .. even my words could not get through her thick dweller skull. It was a complete waste of my time and only solidified all my recent thoughts on dwellers. If this Tribe needed a colossal presentation on the weak minded stupidity .. the soft whining lack of survival instinct ... the entirety of why we do not like dwellers .... this was it. Pity the next person who comes here from the cities. It will be hard to follow that act .. for all the wrong reasons.

I returned to the fire .. Asria had told me she did not wish to be mated to Serge .. news to me ... so now I asked her what changed her mind. She said she had not changed her mind .. that is the way she thought the entire time. But knowing that it was something I wanted she did not wish to be a burden.

huh

I reminded Asria I never said anything about what I wanted .. in fact I had assured her there were better men than Serge when she went out of her way to tell me there were worse. She replied to me that she was not listening properly at the time.

huh

I told Asria it would go much easier if she would just be honest with me about what she wanted and needed. That it would go better than trying to think ahead for me .. as she would most likely get it wrong.

She told me she was sorry .. and asked me if I would still ask her what she wanted knowing that she would be honest about it.

I told her I would ask her what she wanted even if I knew she would lie about it. It was just my way .. but she would be much more comfortable if she allowed me to actually provide the things she needed and/or wanted.

She told me she had almost finished the Memory of Tug .. and asked if she had told me about it. I told her that no .. I had not heard about it. She said she was painting him a memory of his father.

Painting? Well .. this was interesting.. I automatically thought of the Artist and of the project. I had no idea that Asria had any talent in the area and I wished to understand it. Perhaps Asria could do the project better? It would be good to understand this completely before I went any further. I told her I had no idea she was an artist. She said it was because she had not painted her wagons this year. She said that she would be painting the memory of Tug's father for him .. a calendar of sorts just not done in the traditional way of beads or pegs.

I told her that was interesting. She wanted to know if it was a good interesting or a bad interesting. I told her it was the kind of interesting that was not normal .. for a Year Keeper .. seemed to edge into the world I understood as Artisan.

She said .. she was not an Artisan ... but in fact that all Tuchuk were artisans ... that art was not about talent it was about content.

huh

I was getting a little confused at this point. But this was something I genuinely wished to understand. I asked her to explain the difference for her. She asked me if I meant between talent and content.

Danger .. as if I was going to step in that one. I may be clueless sometimes but I like to think I am not quite that .. stupid.

I told her .. no ... that was too confusing. That I simply wished to know what the difference was between what she was doing and what Seveya was doing. Because I thought Seveya had said something to the fact that .. that was what she did ... and offered to others. Granted I could be wrong .. I was merely trying to understand something that ... is not easy for me to grasp.

She told me her view .. of what she painted compared to what Seveya painted ... and I was still confused so I asked her a more direct question ... if she wanted to paint .. why not be an Artisan? Was this all about Asria wishing to switch Clans? Was I missing one of those "Serge" moments again? Where she said all the things she "did not" mean?

She got snippy and defensive with me and told me there was a difference .. a big difference.

Well .. I hoped so .. was that not why I was asking in the first place?

She said all her family were Year Keepers and she was learning to understand the wheel calendars better .. and could she not be a Year Keeper who painted? If Seveya was painting memories .. why could she not a Year Keeper.

huh

I told Asria she was not understanding my words at all. She could do whatever she wished .. I was simply trying to understand but .. I was all right with not understanding. And I turned away from her.

Really fucking comfortable with it .. as a matter of fact.

She said .. from behind me ... that she had gotten defensive ... and I simply nodded in reply.

She said she was sorry and got up to come near me. Touching my arm. She does not know me very well ... not very well at all.

She told me she wanted to be a Year Keeper because Trayu was a Year Keeper and she wanted him to be proud of her.

My irritation blossomed into rage. Before I could stop the words they fell from my tongue .. I said ... if the only reason she was a Year Keeper was because her dead mate was one .... and that was when I caught myself.

I got up to leave .. she was trying to get an explanation out of me. What did I have to tell her? Nothing she needed to hear ... I told her to forget everything I had said and walked away.

At least I have the answer about who I need to ask to do my project.