Sharp Tongues

Women.

I have been pleased to avoid them lately. For days. You would not realize how hard that is to do .. when you actually set about doing it. But I have managed .. succeeded. I have kept the harping nasty sharp tongued whining gossiping prattling things at bay. And thereby ... comfortable. I am quite satisfied with myself.

We .. as a Tribe .. are getting ready to head to the Love Wars. Tradition .. challenge ... entertainment. All the things a Tuchuk lives for.

I was making my way towards the Main Fires when the tone of one of the women meant for the stake could be heard above the others. By the Sky I know she is beautiful but .. she makes me tired. She makes me feel all the muscle aches from the entire day of riding .. herding. That is just not what a woman is raised to do. Especially one for the stakes. She is raised so that her very tongue is pleasing to men .. so it rings clear and beautiful with a challenge. So that her presence .. her very appearance lends to a man's comfort. He feels better just having her near. He wants to possess her .. or protect her ... even face a famed Turian warrior to do so. Right now I would give half my bosk .. let alone fight some Turian ... for just such a voice .. such an appearance.

Such a woman.

I veered off sharply and returned to my wagons. I will not even suffer the company of my slaves this evening. They do not know me well enough yet for me to seek out their chatter when I am like this. They will only annoy me with their efforts and I will end up trying to put an end to their existence.

When did the difference between haughty and obnoxious get so blurred? When did men forget what women were supposed to be raised for? Even women not meant for the stakes .. who would pay to have a sharp tongued negative minded woman? What bride price could be set for such?

I can not answer .. and venting has not given me any comfort. My only ease of thought is found in solitude. It is taking much more than I would have believed to erase the wounds left by stupidity across my synapses. I am irritable and I feel the weight of my own anger like a fondly remembered cloak warding off the frore intent that nips at my heels.

No .. it is much better that I am alone right now. The time when I would have sought solace in a woman has long since fallen into the past. Fallen by the wayside with those whom I hurt so badly with my attempts to find that ease of spirit .. not one of them able to get passed my brutality. It is better that I do not try to share these times with anyone.

It will fade .. it always does. I will return to the fires and tolerate even the sharpest of tongues and I shall pretend to be socially adjusted and no one will notice the difference. And surprisingly I am even looking forward to the Love Wars .. perhaps I will hear a voice .. I will set my eyes upon a woman ..

... a woman worthy of such effort from a man.